Difference between NEED and WANT

Chris got his mission call about 4.5 months before his MTC entry date. Which has been pretty hard because at first I wasn't trying to show him how hard I was taking everything. I was showing him the super excited side of how I was feeling, not the side that was wondering what I would do with out his support and help.

When he had 43 days left before he leaves I just broke down and told him all of the emotions I was feeling. I didn't tell him how hesitant I was about him leaving because I didn't want him to hear me say I was sad about him leaving because I thought he might want to stay. That's why I was having such a hard time with  myself because on one side I wanted him to stay so dearly, But the other half NEEDED him to go! I remember it being a real tug-of-war. I had to express to Chris the need and want I had, this is where the definition of need and want become very important; Where wanting him to stay is so much less important than me needing him to go because I know of the enormous spiritual growth that happens.

When I told Chris about the tug-of-war I was having Chris said that he thought I just wanted to push him out the door. It wasn't even the case at all.

Now only four days left until he leaves, and there is still a small part of me wanting to be selfish and have him stay but as each day passes it becomes smaller and smaller. I realize that the people of Taiwan need him waaaaaaay more than I do. Right here, right now he has been called to be a full time servant of the Lord. I would never try and hinder that. That needs to be his number one priority before everything else right now. I want to be a strength to Chris, always trying to be virtuous and honest ( thanks Young Women's  leaders for teaching me everything of the sorts :D ) and not to be a set back. He also needs to learn from them too!

Tomorrow is his farewell...actually in like 10 hours. He is writing his talk right now (which is on developing Christ-like attributes) and I am here writing this :) I am so excited to hear him speak because he is just so cute and awkward! Jk! I am excited to hear his testimony and hear all the inspiration he has received for this talk.